How Assertiveness Can Help Your Relationships
-Becoming More Assertive
Orlando Counselors and therapist at GroundWork Counseling can help you to change patterns of communication that will help you to become more assertive and self-assured.
Relationships. A constant balancing act. All day every day as we interact with the people in our lives: family members, coworkers, employers, friends, strangers. We “manage” the relationship: how to react, how much to agree, what to say. These decisions are made without much thought. We have developed patterns of behavior over time to help us deal with the situation quickly. Imagine if you had to stop and figure out what to say each time someone spoke to you. Pattern of behavior to the rescue!
GroundWork Counseling’s Orlando therapists state that one of our patterns relates to the continuum of passive-assertive-aggressive. In general, passive people allow the world to act upon them unchecked. They do not believe that they have the power or ability to change how people treat them. Assertive people know how to speak up for themselves, and teach people to treat them with respect and courtesy. At the far end of the spectrum, aggressive people do not bother much with social conventions or filters, and feel entitled to be rude and insulting.
It is very possible to be assertive in one area of your life (e.g. at work) and to be passive in another (e.g. in your romantic relationship)
Why are people passive? This can be due to many reasons:
- you were raised in a family where you were not allowed to speak up or disagree
- your culture/environment taught you to endure disrespect or abuse quietly or you would be punished
- you do not feel you are entitled to be treated well
- you do not feel that you have the power to change how you are being treated
- your self-esteem is low
- you do not have any role models who were assertive
- you simply never learned how to be assertive
At GroundWork Counseling in Orlando counselors and therapists can help you to become more assertive. If you feel that you sometimes act like a doormat and let people walk over you, we want to show you that these patterns can be changed. There is hope. It is very possible to learn how to be assertive. You can retrain yourself and the people around you. The first step is to identify which areas of your life would be better if you felt you could speak up for yourself. Then we can guide you through a series of steps to be more assertive. We can also help you understand what has been holding you back. If you are a flower that has not been allowed to bloom, we believe that your innate worth is still there untouched. Whole. And waiting for your new Assertive Self to help it blossom!
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